Don’t bother, seriously you won’t want to watch this. I do understand. so, no worries. No blame nor shame. This is not entertaining or visually striking. The audio is, just sound, so not like a song or track one might listen to. Time for you to turn around and go another direction.
Tag Archives: why
If as a creative spirit I am an artist, then my genre is experimental in the human and emotional inter and external landscape. General and likely applies quite openly to a great many. No claims on being special or above anyone here.
When I create, be it digital or in real life, like many I am exploring or endeavor to understand some aspect of life. As life is an experience and in one way or another an exploration and or a series of trial and error or experiments. Words, images, color, shape, etc. they all convey thoughts and ideas where understanding is hopefully a component.
I think we misuse understanding and saturate or better yet, dilute what is understanding in the process. I do not understand and therefore I create.
I tend to focus on emotion and humanity. While big, deep and wide topics, I dive in and explore even as I do not know what I may find; kinda the point of an adventure or exploration.
I am not set on making something that is simply pleasing to the eye. In actuality what I or others may see in a visual, auditory or other physical sense we may have is simply a vehicle or transport from what I feel or think to what others do. All the interpretations and adjustments that happen in the process is just that, part of the process.
When I see what other create I also look at what the cost was to bring this into the world. I could look at the time, effort and cost it took, but no, this is not the most significant parts it likely cost to create. It is the emotional labor and in some cases trauma and or struggle to get to where whatever piece is in existence required this to be.
I want to feel something that can inspire me in an emotional or human way. It does not need to be pleasant to look at. It does not even need to be easy. I could continue down this path of words, but why belabor this.
The hands you feed
Many are familiar with the phrase “Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.” While this may be cultural in the wording the idea I think should translate properly.
What happens when you are the one feeding? What are the ways this is done? The methods apparent to me are in the form of money, time, effort, skill, etc.
We feed those we work for and the services we pay for. I saw a post on some social platform some time ago that read something like “the phrase ‘cost of living’ is dreadful when you unpack it.” Makes me think a bit.
We, or most of those in the US, pay for healthcare. The idea as I understand is to maintain a healthy life both physically and mentally as well as emotionally. When you add in the costs of insurance premiums, copay’s and everything else it is at least for the non rich to take on stress from the financial burden of just having insurance, even if it is not or little used. A system to keep you healthy is a source of an attack on that very sense of well-being.
Work is much the same. Give your time, effort and skill just to maintain food and housing with the hope you have some extra to have some enjoyment and counter the impact it creates.
It looks to me the very things we rely on and pay for to live are the same things that attack our very ability to live.
We feed the hands that bite us back!
Anyone who attacks the lives of others is just a small heart, small mind and no soul worth redemption. A convoluted pile of fear coated in a Napoleon complex bathed in narcissism. The fear is buried and distorted by hate that attacks the very fabric of what those people claim.
Attacks on Transgender people Non-binary, Bisexual, Lesbian, Gay, Intersex, Queer plus, plus plus. The long standing history of Black suppression. Asian discrimination against the mere presence of of people not nearly enough effort has been given to understand. This is pitiful and holds no valid excuse or reason of good, noble or even human.
We let these attacks hurt us when we the marginalized can see these for what they are and laugh in the face as they show what they really stand for; money, power, control and to wear a costume to look good for others while their attacks reveal the wolf in sheep’s clothing. The devil in disguise. The pointing out of a red herring. These distract others and themselves from the the inadequacies they bear the weight of.
As a trans woman I have to face my daemons every moment I am. I must think anyone part of a community under attack is pushed to do the same.
Our aggressors are too weak to do the same and make us their targets rather than face what is too much for them, their own daemons. The emotional baggage they carry is too much so they feel they need to distract themselves and others from noticing they are the ones with the issues to be resolved. Too weak to work on themselves, they must attack others.
I do not wish evil upon them unlike what we the oppressed receive. I do not ask for a formal or public apology for their atrocities. I hope they find a way to reconcile what deeply troubles them and find peace in a world of diversity and change.
Calm down, relax and take a deep lifelong breath of unity and peace.
I am not here to throw stones but beg for a better tomorrow for everyone, everywhere regardless of demographic, culture or difference. Communicate and strive for understanding over winning or being right and not wrong. Cooperate and not to demand. Pursue understanding and hold back judgement.
The idea of a dragon changes and one way this is in culture. The symbolism of a dragon is a protecting mother much as a bear will defend her young. The dragon mentors, protects and nurtures and when she must draw on her wisdom and strength, defend against the aggressors.
Let us keep the nurture and caring mother dragons doing just that and end the need to defend as aggressors are nowhere.
The noble and just will let the past be and work tirelessly to forge a new beginning on solid ground with a clean slate.
Can we open the door, negotiate, even if informally, to begin again and vow to an eternal ceasefire for the prosperity of humanity.
My blog is titled Empress Em and this can illicit notions I am aware. The thoughts of a ruler or any standing above is not who I am or what I stand for. I am a peasant Empress of a life full of struggle and not one of privilege or power. I rule only my own choices and mind, no one else.
I also dilute the ideas of Queens, kings, Empress and Emperor to President, Chairman, dictator and the entire list possible to make here. These should not be titles on authority but strive to be Buddha or flow as the Taoist.
If we are to kill anyone we should do so not in hate, desire, power, greed or otherwise but in the warmth and comfort of compassion and kindness.
Forgive and move forward without combat. We are not gods and as such we are fallible and have no authority in the judgement of others. This goes both ways and in every direction.
Can we stop hurting others and can we stop denying ourselves?
Time to let the lie of the red herring no longer be a scapegoat.
In a world where ‘things’ can be classified in an absolute way of this or that to the extent of zero compromise what is lost is comprehension of so very much. Yes, there is a time and place for the true / false, yes / no or equivalent measurement. The bar or line has been moved to include the immeasurable in the realm of only 2 choices arena.
When belief and opinion are defines immutable fact we as people have taken on a new era of complacency. Lost is any acceptance of what could be or the unknown. This has been replaced with an iron clad position. This smells so nefarious it seems to be killing the ability of the general public to smell anything.
I want to type wake up and smell the roses & I did. I also know there is a group who has some kind of, what appears to be irrational fear of a word in there. While I do not know even a remote fraction of everything I will admit this make little sense to me. What id wrong with being awake? I don’t want to live life sleepwalking through to the end. Again, I guess I just don’t get what is going on there.
Sounds limiting to me, 2 choices and that is all one gets or you can this or that and any other variation is off limits. This is a mental and emotional prison. I don’t want to live life in that or any other prison cell, why would I make a decision to do so if I did not have to?
Then there is more and more, then even more single choice, which is the absence of a choice appearing all the time.
I am struggling to understand this world with an attitude of ‘my way or the highway’ and with an ever increasing rate of occurrence ‘my way or die’ which makes me so confused and concerned with just how did we come to this.
Claim for yourself
There is no human alive; past, present or future that has the authority to force another human out of their own control of self. Be that mind, body or spirit.
This is what makes all humanity equal.
The surrender of this fundamental and basic right as a person is so often taken and given. The struggle begins at birth and perpetuates to death.
The efforts to dismantle of each of us is a endless storm and those who can weather this are those that live. All who bow down and surrender never have a life of anything.
Claim for yourself in mind, body and spirit as yours and yours alone.
On a rant
I am queer and trans! No apologies!
If you are one to have issue with me, my existence or anyone else, why are you still reading?
I dissent from the ideas where what is benign is an attack on others or children. This is a blatant excuse to be a destructive and lazy parent. LGBTQ+ people holding hands is not a problem, nor is kissing. Your inability to teach your children is a problem. This over sheltering will only hurt you and them. Those people might think about getting their head out of wherever it is stuck. I wish them the best of luck.
But OK, they are sleeping and just calling it in, so it must all be a silly dream to them. Quite a shock when they join reality and actually wake up, get out of bed and be a part of the world.
So, wake up, wake up you sleepy head, get up, get outta bed, live, love, laugh and be happy! (yes, I did not follow the lyrics quite exactly)
Have a beautiful and fantastic day all you spectacular people who are here and part of the living world! Enjoy some sunshine with open eyes!
In a mindset
Of a society enamored with Tweet size text bits and TikTok video clips I see something, or rather many somethings.
Be it attention span, the let’s just get to the point, in a rush to whatever – I find for myself that life is missing in the banter and arguments for or against whatever some point some try so desperately to make.
The addition, compulsion or fascination with this approach to sudo or false (as I see it) life will be here for the foreseeable future.
Experience and Choice
We can experience life.
Like we can read a book, hear sounds of music and the world.
We can see the sunrise and sunset and all the days and nights can offer.
We can feel a hug, kiss, a fist, knife or bullet.
We can find love or give and take hate.
All the ways we can live.
Does each one of these produce the exactness every time?
Is every sunrise you have ever seen or are all the rainy days the same to you? Is there variation in how one can experience something or is it all the same as is and was?
Is there a choice in there anywhere for any of us?
If the thought is, this or that was as it was because of someone or something other than oneself, then do we have choice? Does freewill exist? If anything can be pointed to as the cause of something then we are victims and choice is given not made. We are nothing but a product of our environment and can do nothing but be pushed like a lifeless bit of debris in the current.
Can we separate the world around us and still take part, enjoy and be if life is a choice to make for each of us? We can allow the universe to carry us as a particle of dust where we go and what may happen is beyond control, or take life in and see, hear, feel, smell the everything as a choice, a will to be part and not just float on where the wind may.