Fear. This one word says so much.

As I attempt to translate my thoughts into words this morning, the word fear is close the the core of those. I grew up in a place and in a family that taught and acted that if something can go wrong in some way, stay away or don’t do, avoid, etc. In one form or another this fear has separated me from so much. Add in my dad and I get a run away from anything that could possibly not turn out well childhood on.

I am not one to regret. I am not making a statement as such. Everything I have been exposed to, thought, felt or otherwise brings me to this very moment. It took all of the fear as part of this to help me to today.

In society we are sold fear in a relentless flashing neon billboard screen that is forcing us to pay attention to their marketing. be that your phone, TV, computer, The image or logo on that person’s clothes over there. It is nearly inescapable. The propaganda and mouth of the fear machine is often dressed in kindness or being helpful. The need to cover-up fear can look like just about anything. Instant gratification or greed, power, or the one that is easy for me to spot is this ‘whatever’ will make this or that easier, faster, etc. These are often as I see a band-aid to cover up fear.

Fear is the great motivator as I have heard it said. I remember when Steve Ballmer of Microsoft was claiming Linux is a cancer and the response from the open-source community was FUD. Ballmer was spreading fear, uncertainty and doubt. This sales tactic is directly related to what I am trying to communicate.

In the end I do not know. In the context of this, why be afraid if there is no reason to be. Sure, I am not pleased when bad or painful things happen but it takes mistakes, pain and all the disappointment and the list could go on and on, but these are not pleasant as it takes a negative reaction to have any opportunity or hope for real, true growth. Lucky is one thing. Being given what one desires is another. Growth does not just happen as it takes more than just work. A painful event and reflection leading to insight and knowledge are one path to growth.

As I ask myself today, why have I been governed by fear the past many weeks? I see in this moment that being afraid of something that is probably not going to happen or even if it is a low chance to, why am I running away from all those mistakes that make success if I just get through the tough part, take the effort to learn and then use new experiences to grow?

I am not suggesting wreck less or blatant behavior here. I am telling myself to allow more mistakes or to accept I may sustain some form of injury be that emotional or otherwise.

No stepping in front of buses or looking down the barrel of a gun but fall down, get up and keep going towards growth. I bet I will meet happiness in many forms along the way.